There Will Be Peace
- Chas
- Jun 15, 2019
- 4 min read
It is imperative that I maintain my peace. Peace is such a beautiful thing but I didn't fully understand or appreciate the importance of peace until the enemy tried to take it and hold it captive. I would consider myself to be a person that speaks to God everyday, several times a day, faithfully. When I think of the strides i've made in life I can't take the credit because it was only one percent of me stepping out of the boat and the other 99 percent was Him carrying me through the valleys for the sole purpose of me being able to tell a testimony that will save a soul or two. I often wonder if people think that it's easy writing about my struggles, my rediculous encounters or my sometimes rocky walk with God. Truth be told, it is one of the most freeing yet stressful projects God has ever put on my heart. Sometimes i'm like God "I don't want to tell them this or that" but He's always like giiiiiirl someone out there is going through the same thing but they don't know me. Allow them to get to know me, the Almighty through you. When the Lord speaks to me like that, it's impossible to disobey so with that being said, let me tell you about my battle this week that led to A REVELATION and spring boarded me to a state of rejoice!
As many of you know, I turned 33 on Friday. Although I felt beyond grateful and blessed to step into my Jesus year, by Monday I felt completely unlike myself. The feelings of comparison, inadequacy and dreaded loneliness set in so I began to do what I know best. PRAY! I reminded myself that every good and perfect thing comes from Him, that He knew me before I was knitted in my mother's womb, that He will use me like He did Moses, that Sarah (wife of Abraham) had a child at 99 just like God promised and countless other things that God has done in the lives of many people I know here on Earth. Still, even with the prayers, the affirmations, the Bible study, the sermons and the worship music I still felt uneasy. I knew that this was a battle between my spirit and the enemy because Satan hates seeing God's children believing in all the promises. The enemy roars around like a lion seeking who he can devour. This week, he wanted me and why wouldn't he? I've been faithful, my life will indeed always glorify God and not only that...I am an unashamed believer. I am the perfect candidate for him to go to war with.
If I told you every tactic the enemy used to keep me in a space of inadequacy or looking back at past mistakes many of you wouldn't believe it. He sent exes out of the blue, he sent a parking ticket, he sent reminders of projects that I have yet to complete with the notion that these projects will never see the light of day and he sent my eyes lurking at the pages of men who broke my heart. Crazy right? I mean..these are men that do not matter because the woman I am now would not even appeal to them. I'm too interested in God's plan and not my own. I would actually be a total bore to them now yet still the enemy convinced me that I should care. I laugh as I write this because it truly is unreal. In the midst of me battling it out with Satan, the good Lord was reminding me that I needed to pray for others. He put a friend I hadn't spoke to in years on my heart so I had to reach out, pray for him and still stay in the spirit which is VERY difficult. It was a wild ride of a week and at times I found myself being short with people just to keep myself from imploding.
Through all of this I still worshipped. This is a tactic I have never fully done before and most of it is because it's been so long since I've been tested this tough spiritually. By Thursday I woke up with a praise on my lips. I felt renewed, blessed to call myself a child of God and worthy of not only His love but the love of my future family He will indeed bless me with. I felt blessed that He bestowed a talent in me to convey and articulate this message. I felt relived that He trust me enough to handle this battle and tug of war with the enemy because he knew I was faithful just like Job. We won. We stepped on the enemy and we came out once again, on top. This morning he smiled at me. How? As I was getting ready for work I pulled out an old purse I hadn't worn in years. I reached into the purse and pulled out an old Intercontential hotel card from my most disastrous relationship to date. There aren't enough pages to tell you all the trauma I went through trying to save a soul while almost losing mine in the process. I know that me stumbling across this card was because God wanted me to see how far i've come. I tossed the card into the trash and said THANK YOU LORD! He has done a whole work in me. My prayer is that someone out there will let Him do a work in you. There will be trials and tribulations along the way but good God, Almighty in the end there will be peace!
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