Last Word

Can I let you all in on a not so secret, secret? I am dramatic. I have always known this but my over-the top-ness came to broadway show levels about 2 months ago. You see, towards the end of last year I promised someone that all 120 pounds of me was going to give them the people's elbow ON SIGHT! This person had ruffled my feathers so bad that I found every way possible to let them know that I don’t like nor will I ever like them. I texted it, emailed it, tweeted it, dm’d it and if the good Lord would’ve given me a pair of wings, I would have turned myself into a carrier pigeon so that I could fly myself to their front doorstep for a special delivery. In the midst of me handing this person a one-way ticket to a hell that I don’t have the power to send them to, I realized that my behavior wouldn’t make them a better person but It was essentially making me unkind and sadly, unforgiving. I had become so filled with rage that I forgot that the removal of this person was nothing but God. So the only person I should have been talking to about it was indeed, God. I think that we have all been there before. We’ve said or done things based off our emotions but then we later realize that none of the dramatics are worth climbing outside of yourself to prove a point. There is nothing wrong with not having the last word and most importantly there is nothing wrong with letting people be themselves without you telling them the error of their ways. Honestly, they will figure it out. I've always prided myself on giving sound advice to my friends but I started to realize that I needed to be a better friend to myself. My advice to myself is.. self-control… Get some. I also think that I need to be clear about the things I will and will not accept because if I would have stuck to my guns in the first place this person would have never had the chance to be in my life or in a space to get me upset. As I type this I can now laugh at how utterly ridiculous the entire situation was but I’m also so glad that God is so forgiving. I mean, my emergency repent button has been pushed so many times I know God is tired of hearing from me. He still listens though and if you are quiet enough you can hear him too. On this past Sunday I did what i've done many times-I went to the alter and I promised that this year would be a year that I put God first in everything. I wont move without him because the truth is, I can’t and I refuse to do life without him. So for anyone out there that has a hot temper and a witty mouth..Do yourself a favor and leave the last word tactic alone so that you have enough space in your hand to pick up some peace!